...getting fancy with greens from the earth and sea....After many days of feeling "out at sea," I can see land and the waves of emotion have calmed. I have discovered that JFing's purpose (for me) was not to solve my problems, but to bring to light all the deeply embedded emotions that have accumulated over my 28 plus years on this earth.
During the JF I was so consumed in the physical act of shopping, juicing, drinking, blogging, pooping, and peeing that not much time was left to just sit with myself and listen to all the profound spiritual awakenings that were occurring simultaneously.
Now that I am only a part time juicer, I can't say that I have more time on my hands to meditate, but clearly the Universe has decided that I am in a place to handle the growing pains and pleasures that come with pushing the boundaries of expansion.
I am so grateful that I have been blessed with this opportunity now -- pre-marriage, pre-kids, pre-adulthood (technically does not start till you are 30 in some schools of thought -- I'll gladly be a kid for two more years;)-- so that when I do get married ( in 4 months!!), have kids (TBD), and become an adult I will know myself that much better, be able to love and give that much more, and be truly ready to live this life for more than just myself.
JFing has humbled me in many ways and given me the opportunity to see clearly what my strengths and weaknesses are and how each are equally an asset in this so called life. After all, without my weak points I would never be able to see my strengths and visa versa. Contrast is a blessing not a curse (usually;)
And now the process of trusting myself begins. Trusting that my body and mind know what to do and when to do it, trusting that being healthy and joyful can be one with each other, trusting that I can let go of my survival mechanisms and that I will still be ok. This is such a life long process that I can't expect to vanish in 30 days, 30 weeks or even 30 years! Embracing not rejecting is the real work for me.
Thankfully I like embracing, that's not work that's fun! Hey, where's Michael?!?! ;)
Thank you all for your loving support. Anytime you need a hug, I am here for you: ready, willing and able!
xxkyle
2 comments:
YUMMMMMYYYYY!!!! : )
Hi Kyle!
I was so happy to read these last two posts! I was really happy to read about your spleen discovery, and interested in what you learned because I ruptured my spleen in a car accident at age 11 and feel like I have shared much of your journey with the sugar/imbalanced eating. I will start sending my spleen more love now...I imagine that this Juice Feast will do wonders for it too.
I am really proud (and I mean that as a friend) of you for your level of commitment and self inquiry, I feel the same way about all of this self discovery we are blessed to experience before become "women" and then mothers. I look forward to sharing that journey with you too!
All love and blessings,
Katrina :)
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